Double Buggy Chaos

Choosing a double buggy has its own unique problems. You look at double buggies and suddenly the price rockets and you don’t get anything thrown in, you have to pay for ALL the extras. It’s like the “w” word – as in ‘Wedding’. When you buy anything under this category it shoots the price up. Same with the word ‘multiples’ or ‘twins’.  Shops sell an all-in-one ‘travel system’ (pram to you or me) that can have an interchangeable seat / car seat / crib / bassionet to use from newborn until they are 18 years of age (or near enough), with rain cover, foot warmer, kitchen sink and bathroom all rolled in for a reasonable price of under £200.  But do you get offered this fantastic package deal for twin buggies? No. Just a bog standard pram that sits 2 chairs side by side all for around £600 (!!!) AND then you have to buy the rain cover, foot warmer and every other bit extra. (Why????) Anyway, we chose the smallest side to side double buggy on the market.

Mr G and I didn’t want to choose who sat behind the other with no view but the back of a seat so decided side by side seats were for us. I do love it but it does cause getting around a bit of a challenge. My local shops are as you would expect, small and perfectly formed. Which means I cannot get in or out of them. I think I could get into most doorways but then I would be stuck and feel a bit like a cork in a bottle – can’t physically move and block everyone else coming or going. In the early days I was out walking and wanted a sandwich so headed for the nearest Cafe. I naively entered with gusto as I was glad to be out and about but ended up hitting and dragging so many chairs and tables with me that I gave up 4 foot in. I then didn’t want to look even more of an idiot (!) and just back out and leave as the grand entrance of chair legs screeching on the floor had caught everyone’s attention into staring at me open mouthed, so I shouted my order from the door as if that was my intention all along. At the time, in my head, I think I styled it out but looking back, I don’t think I did.

On another occasion when out and about I desperately needed some water but knew the local shops were not big enough for me to get the buggy through the door. So my creative side came out and I drank the left over water the girls had in their Tippee cups! Meeting up with people who choose and decide on the venue is another issue.  No one thinks like me with a double buggy. I worry whether we can get through the door, whether we can manoeuvre when inside the venue then whether there be enough space beside the table we will be sitting at to park the buggy or will it be in everyone’s way? If I have to park the buggy in a different area to where we are sitting what do I do when the girls want to sleep? Do I stay with the pram when the girls sleep, therefore leaving our guests or try and get the girls to sleep in our arms – which is another challenge in itself. There are so many factors to think about it gets quite stressful before I have even left the house!

Don’t even get me started on the day the rubbish men arrive! It’s like running the gauntlet along the pavement. Not only do I have to contend with bags and bins but also trees, tree roots, cars overhanging their drive onto the pavement, and overgrown hedges.  A day in the life of a double buggy is certainly eventful.

Mummy puts in a ‘grievance’ to her children

Erin670:

This is brilliantly written – not by me unfortunately – so had to reblog it. Love the fact the kids haven’t replied as yet! :-)

Originally posted on Mummy to toddler twins!:

Mummy of toddler twins

At Mummy and Daddy’s house

Somewhere in the Countryside

UK

4 June 2014

 

Dear Harry & Lottie

Re: Grievance regarding my role as Mummy

I am writing to you (my employers) with regards to my role as Mummy, which I was successful in gaining in September 2012.

Although I was extremely happy and fulfilled in my role initially, since you have been approaching two years old there have been a number of growing concerns on my part. As you are fully aware I have tried to discuss these with you on numerous occasions, but unfortunately you choose to ignore me.

I therefore feel compelled to put my problems into writing. Once you have read them I would like to request a formal meeting (which I am happy to have around your craft table) at your earliest convenience, as I am mindful of your busy schedules.

View original 455 more words

Quads – could you do it?

Wow, just wow.

Watching the programme last night about the family with Quads was for me full of memories, joy and aspiration. There were similarities with mine as they were premature and they were both so tiny but that is where the similarities stopped. I had two, they had four.

I felt their exhaustion, stress, obsessing about their weight, relentlessness and days rolling into one all over again. I had complete empathy and awe for the parents.

Until you have more then one child you understand most but not all that multiple parents have to go through.

But a 3 day break abroad? I mean seriously?? I break out in a sweat trying to contemplate the logistics of a family of 4 but not 6?!?  And to top it all off their bags were lost – every travellers nightmare!  I would have had a meltdown – actually I would have had one in the beginning just trying to pack for the holiday (do you know how much “stuff” you have to take everywhere!)   They are very brave and a perfect family with the perfect attitude for quads.

Ultimately It put things into perspective for me. No matter how tough a day I am having someone, somewhere is having just the same or tougher and it’s not how you deal with it (my preferred tonic at the end of the day is red wine) it’s how you embrace it and deal with every challenge thrown your way.

The word of the month is GENTLE!

I love watching the girls really looking at each other and their surroundings. They are becoming more aware and curious of the world. I love seeing things through their eyes where everything is new and exciting and AMAZING.  To be a baby again and find a piece of paper the best thing in the whole wide world spend hours happily turning it over and over, examining it, mouthing it and ripping it. Oh the joy!

Every day they are discovering a bit more about the existence of the other. First it was just staring from afar and now it is by touch. I lay them down together to change their clothes and nappy in the mornings and little hands reach out. Sometimes they stroke, sometimes they pat, sometimes they grab and pull clothes and on one occasion I caught Miss P with her finger up Miss C’s nose!

They have increased wanting to touch and feel our faces but what with their little nails and the last second of grabbing means all I seem to be saying lately is GENTLE in many tones (mainly as a yelp). It fascinates me that they grab at each other’s faces and neither of them cry out. I know it hurts but they do not say a word, yet as soon as they flop backwards and miss the pillow that was placed strategically behind them, onto the soft mat, out comes the wail!

Each day their exploration gets a little bit more bold. Clothes are now being pulled until the other falls over. Each others ears, noses and hair are fair game to them to yank and their latest game is to grab each other’s hand in the high chair and pull as hard as they can. This makes mealtimes an already time consuming feat.

One of our poor cats actually sits and allows them to grab at him. They go ecstatic when they see him! His tail and ears are pulled, his hair comes out in large tufts and yet he goes back for more! I try and show the girls what a gentle stroke is but they are so excited that this furry ginger thing with whiskers and tail goes near them that its all grabbing, excited cries and flailing hands.

The only time this cat kept a wide berth from them for a least a day was when he slowly approached one on my knee when,….’BURP‘, the girl brings up some milk and it cleverly lands all over the cats head. I’ve never seen the old cat move so fast.

Keep Up Mummy!

As you’ve read before the beginning was tough and waiting for that first smile from the girls was the reward I was so desperately needing. And when they started to smile, boy, did they smile! They smiled for everyone but me. This went on for weeks! They smiled at strangers, they smiled for Mr G but never for me. I used to shake my fist at them and say “traitors“.

Of course, eventually they did smile for me and it made everything in the world better. No matter how tired I am or pushed to my limits, one look from them beaming at me just melts me. But then once the smiling started their development and needs started changing. Miss C is the one who always pushes for the next stage. Poor Miss P and I are left floundering wondering what we are supposed to be doing.

Our daily routine is my security blanket and when Miss C pushes us forwards, the routine has to change and I am left feeling a bit bewildered and lost. First Miss C refused me when trying to feed her. She spent the 40 mins that Miss P was feeding to scream the house down and kick Miss P in the head!  So I moved onto bottle feeding.

Miss C then had another meltdown and refused a feed on the bottle. So I moved the feeding times from every 3 hours to every 3.5 hours. A few weeks later, Miss C did it again and I move the feeds from every 3.5 hours to every 4!  I have no idea how Miss P felt every time we did this. Luckily Miss P is easy going and has accepted everything so far. I seem to be the one who feels put-out and not able to keep up!

As for development milestones, that’s a tricky one. Miss P seems to do things first like roll from side to side and babble. But then stops.  Miss C does nothing and then does everything at once. She rolls onto her tummy, rolls back again, says da-da-da and other sounds. It’s like she bides her time and then goes…….”ta daaaa! – I could do it all along I just wanted to make a grand entrance!”  Miss C has a habit of rolling on top of Miss P and grabbing at her face which does not please Miss P one bit especially as Miss P hasn’t yet mastered the art of rolling away!  They both have an impressive skill (I am actually quite jealous of this one) which is sucking on their own toes! It is strangely hypnotic to watch yet so weird at the same time.

Both are sitting up with confidence now and they go rigid as a rock if you try and sit them up as all they want to do now is stand on their feet.  (Uh oh. Does this mean walking is round the corner?) Let me just put that to the back of my mind as the logistics of two of them walking is making me nervous and break out in a sweat.

At the moment they are more then content to sit beside each other and play with their toys. Which has recently turned into a battle of the wills as they want whatever toy is in each others’ hand.  Once, one had the head of a toy in their mouth and the other had the foot of the toy in their mouth. It reminded me of a scene with the spaghetti in Lady and the Tramp.

Other times it’s a lot of pulling and flailing arms with crying at the end. I don’t feel I should step in as they need to sort it out between themselves. They wouldn’t understand what I was saying to them if I did scold them. I sometimes just give the culprit a stern look and wag my finger and they return a wide grin back. A lot of the time there is pushing and shoving with the unlucky one losing grip on the toy and falling backwards with feet in the air and the winner having the toy smack themselves in the face. Who is the real winner then? All I know is that I wish I had filmed it to send into You’ve Been Framed!

Exploding poo

No one tells you about the poo. I mean the poo after the newborn bit and how it appears. You really are in for a treat. You are going to love how warm it gets too!

I had around 16-20 nappy changes a day at the beginning, not including when they go immediately after a nappy change. The exploding poo or worst poo incidents always seem to be at the most inconvenient time.

I’ve had poo dripping across the floor and all over the scales at a weigh-in with the midwife.

I’ve had poo land in my hand as I changed them. It looks like icing coming out of a piping bag! I always wonder how such a small baby could produce so much poo! Where are they storing it?

I’ve gone through 3, yes 3 nappies in less then a minute as the poo just kept on coming!

I’ve had poo cover the whole surface area of inside the nappy so when you take it off it looks like they are wearing a nappy made of poo.

I’ve had poo filling up the whole leg of a romper suit. I thought Miss C had hurt herself and her leg had swollen up but no it was full of warm gooey poo.

When they are on solids, the colour varies according to what they have eaten (which makes it very interesting) and is less runny and more firm like a poo you and I would do. I call these nuggets especially if they are small and perfectly formed. If I find one of these I consider myself lucky. I usually pick these straight out with a wet wipe and reuse the nappy. (I know what you are thinking. Seriously? Eugh! – But when you have twins and change as many nappies as I do everyday you look for short cuts – But I only do this if the nappy isn’t also wet).

Once on a play date, I was at an NCT ladies’ house and I changed Miss C’s nappy. It was a typical nugget as described above and instead of picking it out I thought I would be polite and just change the whole nappy as I was with company. But when I held the nappy in my hand and started to wrap it up, the poo fell out and rolled across her carpet…..I was mortified! Thankfully it was so firm that it didn’t do any lasting damage but coincidently I have not been invited back since!

My favourite is a sneaky poo. It lulls you into a false sense of security. You go for a nappy change,… you wait with bated breath as to what you might find,….you open the front of the nappy and see…. a pea sized nugget. Phew, what a relief. Quick nappy change here then……. or so you thought!  As you lift the legs up you see the nugget getting bigger and bigger and bigger and then you realise that it has been squashed all the way up the back. Brilliant. Not a quick nappy change as you thought but half a pack of wet wipes later and another change of clothes.

Its very rare a day goes by that you don’t find some clothes soaking in the kitchen sink but don’t even get me started on the day I came home to find Mr G had poo on his face!

Parenting twins

Parenting twins is nothing like parenting singles.  You try and explain to friends and family and they give all the right noises and nod their heads and say “of course”, “yes I understand” but their eyes always glaze over.  They will always be cuddling one child at a time when visiting and so they will never have a time when they are left to deal with both and really understand my point of view.

There are certain things I have never done as a parent – which is rock my child to put them to sleep and I have never held a child constantly in my arms or on my lap all day whilst they slept on me. Why? Because there are 2 babies. I have had to do things differently so that I can make things easier during the days when I am on my own.

For comfort and sleeping problems, the girls have come to know the pat and rub method – which is something I can do with one hand in each cot if they are both needing me. Rocking them now would just agitate them. It is on rare occasions and usually from complete exhaustion do I get one falling asleep on me but its usually when Mr G and I are together somewhere so there is another pair of hands to assist with the other baby. Although, I am pleased that they are happy to sleep in their cots and are not reliant on Mr G and I, I do wish sometimes that they would want a little cuddle and a nap on me!

I also secretly love it when one of the girls wakes up from their naps before the other. It means I can spend some quality one-on-one time with them.

The most common comment I get from people is about waking the girls up for a feed. Yes, I do. Blasphemy isn’t it? With singles you can feed on demand, you can work the day around them, you can follow their lead – which is what most parents know and understand. But not with twins. You have set feeding times, you feed them at the same time, you have to fit in a certain amount of feeds before bedtime to know that they will sleep through the night comfortably and have had the recommended amount of milk.

If people just stopped and put themselves in my shoes for just a minute they would understand the challenges faced with multiples. In my opinion, the routine has not only helped me but helped the girls and I have 2 very happy and content little babies who have consistently put on weight considering they were premature. We got our evenings back from when they were 10 weeks old and they have slept through the night since they were 15 weeks old.  I don’t want to sound boastful but hey, I must be doing something right!